April 12, 2021 The Newspaper Serving LGBT Los Angeles

DEAR AIDAN: Feeling Idle in Los Angeles

Dear Aidan,

I know it seems like a stupid simple problem but I just moved to Los Angeles area and I literally cannot STAND the increase of time I spend in the car! I find other drivers to be so rude and I can’t help but get all tense behind the wheel. 

Is there a driving technique or something that I can employ to make driving easier? Or a way I could cut down the driving time?

Dear Driven to Madness!

I feel you! I used to absolutely hate driving! I hated driving so much in fact that I had 8 car accidents in the first 3 years of driving! 8 CAR ACCIDENTS is a lot even for an Asian Driver (Kidding I’m a comic). 

For those readers out there who do not have issues with “Driving” I want you to read this article and place some other area you are discontented with your life because the advice crosses over.

I think whenever we have to do something that we generally do not like to do and we have to adjust to a new environment we all have a tendency to jump straight to the “ELIMINATION OF THE NEW FACTOR THAT’S CAUSING US STRESS”.I see people do this with boyfriends all the time… My girlfriends will be hemming and hawing over the fact that they don’t have a boyfriend for months at a time, then they will get one and once they do, they blame the boyfriend for her insecurities (there are issues to work through every relationship) and so they ELIMINATE that thing that they have been wanting all along.

Follow Aidan on Insta/Facebook/Twitter @Aidanparkshow Check out Aidan’s funny advice podcast @WhatToDoShow and his tour dates and more at aidanpark.com.

So in a scenario like the one you presented, it is good to take a look at what aspects of this is controllable and what is uncontrollable. If you live in Southern California, you are more than likely to be in your car more and that is probably uncontrollable unless you are willing to take the bus (which I would not recommend). The car IS the most effective way to get around in general so getting out of driving altogether is not the answer.

In a situation in which an unpleasant option is unavoidable, the best thing that you can do is to “make the best of it”. But I would actually recommend taking this a step further. Just in the linguistics alone, “making the best of it” implies a dreadful event that must be stomached at best. The thing to do is to try to create a TERRIFIC environment for yourself every opportunity you can get, not to merely settle for “being able to handle it”

As much as I used to hate driving, I really love driving now truly! When i discovered this concept of trying to create a terrific enviroment within an unpleasant situation and not just “geting by”. Of course there are practical things that you can do to feather your nest such as picking good tunes, and putting up photos of loved ones… but I also think it is important that you pick a narrative that helps you every chance that you get. 

Once your start directing your thoughts with purpose to a place of gratitude and appreciation such as “I know this traffic jam is awful but at least I have a car and it is air conditioned. I can just relax in the COOL AIR” before you know it all of the positive aspects that you will have been pointing out will become the truth for you! 

Related Posts

National AIDS Memorial Mary Bowman Arts in Activism Award Given to Westside Local

April 11, 2021

April 11, 2021

Poet, Activist, Artist, and Westside local Ima Diawara uses her art and activism to raise greater awareness about bigotry, stigma...

Edify TV: Helping Local Cultural, Religious and LGBTQ+ Centers

April 11, 2021

April 11, 2021

Westside cultural, religious and LGBTQ+ centers stand to benefit from a new fund the City of Los Angeles has created...

West Hollywood Celebrates National Poetry Month

April 9, 2021

April 9, 2021

The City of West Hollywood will celebrate National Poetry Month in April with a variety of events and exhibitions honoring...

L.A. Stage Alliance To Cease Operations After Several Companies Exit

April 9, 2021

April 9, 2021

The Los Angeles Stage Alliance (LASA) announced that it would “cease all operations” following the departure of more than 25...

James Charles Admits Messaging 16 Year Old Boys

April 4, 2021

April 4, 2021

YouTube star, makeup artist and Los Angeles resident James Charles issued an apology video entitled “Holding Myself Accountable” admitting to...

Trans Los Angeles A Film Full Of Queer Latinx Talent

April 4, 2021

April 4, 2021

Trans Los Angeles is an anthology composed of four short films directed and written by transgender director Kase Peña. Each...

Venice Pride Flag Lifeguard Tower Gets Facelift

April 1, 2021

April 1, 2021

The Venice Pride Flag Lifeguard tower gets a fresh coat of paint and a bit of a facelift just in...

Pride Poets’ Corner: Double Dutch Nymph By Féi Hernandez

March 28, 2021

March 28, 2021

The Pride LA and West Hollywood Poet Laureate Brian Sonia-Wallace would like to introduce Féi Hernandez featuring their latest work...

Los Angeles Becomes First No-Kill City For Animal Shelters

March 28, 2021

March 28, 2021

The City of Los Angeles has become a no-kill city for animal shelters for the first time, thanks to the...

Long Beach Rainbow Lifeguard Tower Burned Down

March 25, 2021

March 25, 2021

Long Beach’s rainbow lifeguard tower, painted by lifeguards in June in honor of Pride month, was destroyed in a fire...

Candlelit Vigil Held For Rayanna Pardo

March 25, 2021

March 25, 2021

A candlelit vigil was held on March 20th for Rayanna Pardo, a trans woman of color who died three days...

Pride Poets’ Corner: Penetrate By Terry Wolverton

March 21, 2021

March 21, 2021

In honor of Women’s History Month The Pride Poets’ Corner, curated by West Hollywood Poet Laureate Brian Sonia-Wallace, wished to...

Remembering EZTV Founder Kate Johnson Who Saved LGBTQ+ Media Work

March 21, 2021

March 21, 2021

Kate Johnson was an artist and founder of EZTV. Johnson saved and stewarded an important archive of new media work...

Ivy Bottini – WeHo Icon & LGBTQ Advocate Dies

March 14, 2021

March 14, 2021

Ivy Bottini an artist, mother and a legendary activist, devoting over 50 years to the feminist & LGBTQ  struggle for...

WeHo Lesbian Speakers Series

March 11, 2021

March 11, 2021

The City of West Hollywood’s Lesbian Speakers Series will celebrate Women’s History Month with a panel of dynamic lesbians and...