Getting Damaged Yet Again: “Heathers” Gets a Queer TV Remake

Winona Rider invents Resting Bitch Face in the original “Heathers.” Photo via Wikipedia.

If you didn’t already know it by now, nothing is sacred. Certainly not Michael Lehmann’s 1988 black comedy pièce de résistance, “Heathers.” At the time of its release, Winona Ryder was coming off the high of the role – Lydia Deetz in “Beetlejuice” – that would see her typecast as the quirky misfit for most of her career. The screenwriter, Daniel Waters, was offering Hollywood his first feature, and oh, what a precedent it would set for him. Sure, he would also go on to work with Ryder again, but it was on the, shall we say, much less iconic “Sex and Death 101” (released during Ryder’s more unsuccessful comeback period, post-shoplifting.) Thus, “Heathers” is hallowed for more reasons than the fact that it’s a the grandmother of the high school dark comedy – it’s also the magnum opus of Waters’ oeuvre (though “Batman Returns” is a close second.)

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Why, then, must the only person thus far listed as having writing credits, Jason A. Micallef (whose only major movie has been “Butter” starring Jason Bateman – though its tone was dark in the vein of “Heathers,”) do this to us? Sure, it’s not really the writer’s fault when these remakes happen, but don’t give them so little credit as to think they’re not the ones pulling the puppets’ (actors) strings.

Then again, maybe Micallef and the other pre-production minds behind the project are simply trying to stay relevant in a world ever sensitive to the notion of “being left out.” As one of the first pieces of content to appear on the as of yet non-existent Paramount Network (coming 2018,) “Heathers” is another of the latest in a series of reboots seeking to cash in on the trend of gender-reversal (see: “Lord of the Flies” starring an all-female cast) and race (see: Jay-Z’s “Moonlight” video.) Although this is theoretically a positive direction for pop culture, notorious for its longstanding favoring of all that is white and heteronormative, at what cost is Hollywood regurgitating these former monuments to filmic perfection?

Though the actors – who have been most vocal in publicizing the show at events like the VMAs – are gung ho about telling the media how different and edgy an upgrade it is, the overall feeling one gets from watching the trailer is like that of eating cold oatmeal (or brain tumors?)

According to James Scully, the character playing Jason Dean this time around, “Don’t get attached to any of the characters . . . we have more time to kill more people. We can kill as many people as we want.” So, basically, “Heathers”” the TV show is “Scream Queens” with a genderqueer slant and fewer ladies. Or you could just watch past episodes of “Scream Queens,” which got canceled because it was original.



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  62. JohnDecember 23, 2010Fantastic work, how exactly do you get the particle glow for each one? Is it a bitmap or do you apply some form of pixel shader onto it. I'm trying to get used to shaders and HLSL, still trying to work out how to make stuff 'glow'. Add a radius of X amount of pixels and slowly decrease opacity?

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  64. Nicole, Thank you for sharing this story. I wish for you and Alison a fantastic “Forever Day”! You’ve made mine more fantastic than you know. Maybe I’ll be able to write my story and repay for writing yours… May you two have a fantastic holiday! (You two look like family…) 🙂    

  65. [..YouTube..] You’re welcome Kiefer!!! I LOVE YOU!!! So sad to see this show end. There will never be a show quite like this. Thank you Netflix for letting me stay up countless hours completely glued to my tv telling myself “Ok, after this episode, I’m definitely going to bed” pfffff Next episode plox =) It’s so addictive.

  66. Oldsalt79As far back as I can remember, moral character was espoused by military leadership in most legitimate military forces. Having served in two separate military’s I can attest to that fact being a primary concern with the secondary attribute being “respect” on the part of the supporting public.It somehow just didn’t compute that a faction, comprising such a tiny segment of the population, could generate such political power as to fundamentally change the core tenets of our military. There must be some other reasoning behind such a potentially drastic step.

  67. The credit rating agencies businesses in their own right; they work in collaboration with the big financial services corporations and the accountancy firms to effectively invent value from nothing… what doing now is trying to protect their clients/collaborators from the devaluation of their assets, even if it destroys the economy of every country in europe. Go look at Yves Naked Capitalist blog and anything by Steve Keen.

  68. Just a heads up – most commercially available yogurt ferment the milk long enough for it to set but not long enough for the lactose to be broken down. Best if you eat homemade. (it isn’t hard at all) Also some people can’t tolerate cow’s milk because they are casein sensitive. In that case, goats milk might work better.

  69. I’m betting that Alcide will be involved with the actual work. I’m not holding my breath that Eric will be the one footing the bill, but I’ll be happy if that’s the case. AB has shown Eric’s caring side in other ways. I’m glad the house is getting fixed, but I’d be okay with Sookie paying for it herself with her Dallas money. I’d still like a time jump to get some of the other story lines advanced a bit. Any signs pointing in that direction will make me very happy.   0 likes

  70. When God closes a door, he opens a window. Something that I have found that has never failed me yet and hopefully it is the same for these talented women!And I am sure it won’t be easy for the talented staff left behind to fill their shoes and fill the gaps as everyone finds their new roles in the organization. Change is never simple or easy. Best wishes to all!

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  72. Millions of years of blind evolution, a species whose gene patterns are distributed almost by brownian motion, and another that can perceive beauty in the photonic reflection of that distribution, can record it, and broadcast it around the planet to share with conspecifics. I like our world. A lot. Great shot, Walter!

  73. Hmm okay, blev bare lidt demotiveretda min søster sagde, at det sikkert ikke fedt, men væske og muskler du taber siden det går så langsomt.. Så tænkte at jeg måske gjorde noget forkert.Grunden til den sene frokost er, at jeg læser på universitetet, og plejer at have timer til 3. Men skal nok prøve at rykke frokosten lidt så jeg spiser ved 12-13 tiden, og se om det gør en forskel. Men tak for det hurtige svar det er så dejligt at du er så hurtig til at hjælpe

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  75. Hi Cindy. I think it is important to realize that there are many reasons why people reveal their condition to the world carefully – after all – one’s primary responsibility is to protect one’s self. – We are under no obligation to do so. – Good question! Yes, there is a Get Out Of Straightjacket Free card – highly prized! – Glad to see you again! A

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  81. Giovana comentou em 13 de janeiro de 2010 às 18:55. Nossa, vc quebrou uma e tanto pra mim!!! Comprei esse kit da Coastal e tava meio perdida… Arrasou!!! E um aviso as meninas que estão com pressa, eu fiz uma compra na Coastal no dia 5/12 e chegou no dia 5/01, ficou dias e dias na receita. Mas eu achei os pincéis ótimos e as paletas tb.Bjo enorme Júlia, sempre generosa!!!

  82. Per Camicius Ma figlioli cari, è estate! Lo sapete che anche la tv va in vacanza?Beh, sulla Rai fanno Superquark. Ed è estate anche per la Rai…Avevo capito che era una replica, o piuttosto, un vecchio servizio rimaneggiato e rimontato. Qualcuno può confermare?L'estate è anche la stagione delle repliche.

  83. I am due in 1 week and i am really nervous and probably getting on my husbands nerves with the “are you sure you packed the bottles?” and the ” don’t forget to install the car seat into the car”. This really helped me, though i am still not sure with the swaddling because in the U.K some midwifes frown upon it but they have the SwaddleMe’s in England to and my mother just told me to swaddle my baby because it will make him feel more secure, what do you think i should do?


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