June 18, 2025 The Newspaper Serving LGBT Los Angeles

Taking Care of Yourself During the Holidays

By Matthew Verdun, M.S.

We all get the messages that the holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, togetherness, and love but we don’t always feel that way. Many people have caring families, even those can become overwhelming. Some people have families that are not supportive, causing pain when they try to be close to them. In addition to family stresses, holidays bring about parties where consumption of too much alcohol or other things can cause us problems or financial stresses related to gifts and events. If any of these apply to you, here are some things you can do to stay grounded and connected.

First and foremost, know your limits. Think about your limits with finances, time, and stress. How many people should you buy for and how much can you spend on gift-giving? Do you enjoy giving because it makes you feel good or look good? If you tend to give too much because it feels good, consider whether or not you should give smaller items or find a different approach to feeling better by giving (more on this later). Talk to your family or significant other about realistic limits on how much to spend on each other or on family, friends, and parties.

If you love going to parties and love being included but know there are only so many hours in a day, it may be necessary to decide which parties are required and which are optional. Even social butterflies need to rest their wings occasionally. If you must see everyone you know it may be a good idea to decide which events you are going to see them at.

If you know an event will be stressful you may want to pre-plan your exit. This is true for stressful family events or parties you can’t back out of. If you know your family is going to cause stress it may be good to have strategies to avoid certain topics, consider planning what you will talk about, ways to quickly shift the subject from a sensitive or divisive topic. It may also be good to talk to someone you trust and know will be there about ways to avoid or divert stress or drama.

If you know you tend to enjoy drinks or other substances a little too much make plans in advance Do you have a designated driver or will you take Uber or Lyft? If your friends encourage excess drinking you can make a few good excuses in advance (cutting down because you don’t want to gain weight, some innocuous medication that interacts with alcohol, feeling bloated, etc.). If you find yourself having difficulties because of your drinking you should consult a specialist.

If you feel lonely during the holidays find new activities you can try out. People often volunteer during the holiday season, which is great, but studies show that giving back throughout the year promotes happiness and well-being. Consider continuing volunteer activities after the holidays when those organizations are struggling to find help, this can lead to increased happiness and provide you an opportunity to connect with other people. You can also consider meet-ups or other activity groups. These provide an activity with a readymade group of people with whom to interact.

Finally, if you are feeling depressed or anxious and are worried about your mental health reach out to a professional in your area. Your insurance provider maintains a list of professionals that take your insurance. If you do not have insurance, you can reach out to local mental health organizations or your county mental health agency for referrals. Many cities and counties also use a 211 telephone number or website for social service organizations. If you are having an emergency call 911, if you are having thoughts of suicide call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 800-273-8255.

This article is for informational purposes only, please consult a mental health professional regarding your specific situation or mental health needs or substance use.

Matthew Verdun, M.S.
California BBS License Number: LMFT 85437
matthewverdunmft.com
(424)254-0900

Related Posts

Justice Served by the Slice: L.A. Chefs Rally for Pies for Justice Fundraiser

June 18, 2025

June 18, 2025

Sweet, Savory, and Pizza Pies to Support Foster Youth and Civil Rights Chefs and restaurants from across Los Angeles and...

Downtown Santa Monica Goes All Out for Family-Friendly Pride Celebration

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

SaMo Pride’s Biggest Celebration: Live Music, LGBTQ+ Vendors, Giveaways Downtown Santa Monica will come alive with color, music, and celebration...

Trump Executive Order Lets VA Doctors Deny Care to Trans Patients or Marital Status

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

New VA Policy Tied to Anti-Trans Order May Allow Refusals of Treatment Medical professionals across the Department of Veterans Affairs...

Journalist Files Lawsuit After Being Hit by ‘Less Lethal’ Munition Fired by Sheriff’s Deputies

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

LASD Faces Legal Claim After Journalist Wounded at Anti-Ice Rally  Independent photojournalist Nick Stern has filed a civil rights claim...

CAP UCLA’s 2025–26 Season Spotlights Queer Voices, Global Visionaries, and Musical Trailblazers

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

The New Lineup Celebrates Boundary-Pushing Performances Across Disciplines The UCLA Center for the Art of Performance (CAP UCLA) has announced...

Cedars-Sinai Seeks Public’s Help Identifying Unconscious Man Found in Beverly Grove

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

Man Remains Hospitalized After Being Discovered Near Cedars Sinai Cedars-Sinai Medical Center is asking for the public’s assistance in identifying...

US Marines Temporarily Detain Civilian Near Federal Building in West Los Angeles

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

Military Confirms First Known Detention by Active-Duty Troops Deployed by Trump U.S. Marines temporarily detained a civilian near the Wilshire...

Judge Orders NIH to Reinstate LGBTQ+ Health Research Grants Cut Under Trump Policies

June 17, 2025

June 17, 2025

Federal Court Finds Dei-Related Grant Cancellations Unlawful; Ruling Restores Funding Funding for hundreds of medical research projects, including critical studies...

GLAAD and eBay Launch Celebrity Auction for Pride Month, Up for Bid Through June 26

June 16, 2025

June 16, 2025

Exclusive experiences with Shakira, Orville Peck, Andy Cohen, Dylan Efron, and More  GLAAD and eBay have joined forces to launch...

Tyler Malek Celebrates New Ice Cream Cookbook With Sweet Pop-Ups in West Hollywood

June 16, 2025

June 16, 2025

Chef to Appear at Book Soup and Debut Limited-Edition Matcha Sandwich at GGiata Tyler Malek, co-founder and head chef of...

(Video) Home Front Build Maintains Original Architectural Vision For Modern Homes

June 16, 2025

June 16, 2025

For More Information, Go to homefrontbuild.com For More Information, Go to https://t.co/kip9luQwxX pic.twitter.com/sTuVgfiGkj — Palisades News (@PalisadesNewsLA) June 16, 2025

Nearly One Thousand Rally in West Hollywood to Protest ICE Raids and Trump Policies

June 16, 2025

June 16, 2025

‘No Kings’ Demonstration Draws Large, Peaceful Crowd Through the Rainbow District West Hollywood was the site of another ‘No Kings”...

Tribeca Premiere Honors Carl Bean, Musician, Activist and LGBTQ+ Faith Leader

June 15, 2025

June 15, 2025

New Doc Features Interviews With Lady Gaga, Billy Porter, and Dionne Warwick The life and legacy of Archbishop Carl Bean,...

Americans Split on Immigration and Tariffs’ Impact on Housing Affordability, Survey Shows

June 15, 2025

June 15, 2025

Survey Finds Over Half Believe Less Immigration Could Drive Up Home Prices  A new Redfin-commissioned survey reveals that U.S. homeowners...

Two Suspects Arrested in Fatal Stabbing of Elderly Man in Hancock Park

June 15, 2025

June 15, 2025

LAPD and FBI Apprehend Palmdale Pair Accused of Killing 84-Year-Old LAPD West Bureau Homicide has arrested two suspects in connection...